Selling Out: Winning or Sinning? The Moral Costs of Selling Each Other Out

As a corporate professional I have noticed an unfortunate trend growing among blacks in this country.  That is the popularity of selling out, frankly.  It seems to be more and more prevalent for African Americans to be unreasonably ambitious, behaving as shameless climbers, both in business and in life.  I have personally witnessed black men doggedly sexually harass black women at the behest of white-male managers for their own professional/financial gain.  I have too often seen celebrity blacks be spokespersons for some of the most divisive and hateful bigoted agendas, ones that are objectively racist and offensive even to the average white person, much less an unbought black.  It is a common phenomenon for some employers and government leaders to try to “beard” their known discriminatory practices by hiring a black token who is willing to rebel against other blacks.  Regrettably, when money or competitive gain enter the equation, the gloves seem to come off and it becomes a fight to the death with the black person next to you for every little imaginable inch one can gain over the other.  Is this really winning, playing it smart or arriving… or is it just plain sinning?  Are not our Christian morals applicable at work also or do we leave those at home on a shelf somewhere when we interact with the world?

This behavior is so ironically opposed to the goals of the Civil Rights Movement and its resulting legislation that it is depressing. See e.g., History.com, Civil Rights Act of 1964, (June 25, 2024)(to ban discrimination in employment, housing, voting and places of public accommodation).  Blacks helping bigots discriminate and effectuate de facto segregation is heart breaking to watch.  Said civil rights legal directives are some of our immature country’s most liberating legislation, revolutionizing the quality of life for blacks, women, people of minority faiths and other minorities.  They are some of our country’s most humane accomplishments as a people.  Can you imagine modern society tolerating overt segregation today?  Going back in time to divided buses, lunch counters, schools, hotels, neighborhoods and employers… enforced by police dogs and fire hoses or worse?  Well, selling out is of the same morally dishonest category as was staunch southern segregation.  Why then do so many blacks—who condemn segregation and who have obviously benefitted from equal opportunity and diversity initiatives—sabotage the successful enforcement of civil rights laws and programs?  Why has it become so socially acceptable, if not praised, for blacks to turncoat on each other for the smallest fist full of twenties???  What could they be thinking?

The Psychology of Selling Out 

Selling out is an act of less disciplined betrayal, a breach of trust, a bargain-basement deal, done for fast personal gain at the expense of another. Merriam-Webster.com, Sellout (Assessed 12-30-2024)(“to betray one’s cause or associates especially for personal gain”).  For one to betray another there must be some trust involved.  “The only people who can betray you are people you trust.  The emotional impact of betrayal increases with the level of trust you have in the person who betrayed you.” Schafer, J., PsychologyToday.com, Betrayal and Human Relationships, (11-29-2021).  There is an assumed level of reliance that society gives to all black people, presuming that because blacks have likely benefited from some of our desegregation laws they will sincerely opine about these laws being violated and act to uphold them.  That confidence has proven, however, to often be misplaced, as if it is too much responsibility for many blacks.  Though, it may be a reasonable expectation that the average black give a good-faith opinion about racism, such honesty or discipline must be too much to ask of every single black.  Even though integration is a moral cause, all its beneficiaries were not and are not angels.  When we consider it, no ethnic group comprises 100% honest people therein, all races have people with varied levels of integrity, blacks are no different.  E.g., there are many whites who also want to capitalize off the willingness of a few minorities to forsake our integration laws, hoisting sellouts on their shoulders to facilitate their oppressive objectives.  This is an ethical and spiritual failure as well.  Some people are just less morally disciplined than others.  Since we can anticipate that some equal-opportunity recipients will ironically still facilitate racism, pointing to a black selling out should not be justification for abandoning our legal obligations against discrimination.  Similarly, just because we know of some bank robbers who have never been caught it does not mean that we should all go and try to rob our local credit union.  We are morally accountable for ourselves in this life and the next, we all choose how disciplined we want to be with both the State’s and God’s laws.

Moral laws tell us that we should not betray each other as humans generally or as members of the same race but we still do it.  Why?  Psychologically some of the most common reasons why humans forsake their morals and betray each other are selfish motives, out of a lack of empathy for those offended, due to insecurity and low self-esteem, to assert power or control over the other person, because of a misunderstanding about expectations and/or a lack of integrity.

"1. Selfish motives: One of the most common reasons for betrayal is self-interest.  People may betray others to gain power, money, or attention.  They may also betray others to avoid consequences or protect themselves from harm.  In these cases, the betrayer places their own needs above the well-being of others.

2. Lack of empathy: People who are unable to understand or care about the feelings of others may be more likely to betray others.  They may be indifferent to the consequences of their actions, or they may believe that their actions are justified.

3. Insecurity and low self-esteem: Some people may betray others as a result of their own feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem.  They may feel the need to control or manipulate others in order to feel better about themselves.  This type of behavior is often driven by fear of rejection or a need for validation.

…

6. Lack of integrity: When people lack integrity, it can be easier for them to betray others.  This can occur when there are no consequences for their actions or when others are not aware of their behavior.  When the deciding factor around a choice is if someone will get caught or not, that’s an issue of integrity.  My personal definition of integrity? 'Doing the right thing… even when no one is watching.' "

Silber, D., Medium.com, Why Betrayal Happens and How to Help Someone Heal, (03-15-2023); see also, Learning-Mind.com, 7 Psychological Reasons for Betrayal & How to Recognize the Signs, (Oct. 24, 2022), (mentioning an unreasonable sense of entitlement, lack of integrity, avoidance of consequences, lack of empathy, and insecurity as motivators for betrayal). We often blame ourselves after someone has betrayed us, thinking that maybe we are not cool enough or that we should also become shady to avoid being run over by the betrayals of others.  However, these motivating factors have little to do with the worth of those betrayed or any debt owed to the betrayer.  They have everything to do with the selfishness of the traitor, many of whom do not consciously consider what is driving them to betray.  The next time you are tempted to break your moral obligation against discrimination ask yourself: am I being reasonable or self-centered, empathetic or apathetic and reckless, confident that God will provide for me or insecure, a person of integrity or dishonest?

Be More Disciplined, Be More Responsible—Think!  Think of the Costs of Helping Discrimination

Black people especially, we must be more responsible; we must be more disciplined; we have to think about the implications of our decisionmaking.  Helping discrimination can cause serious harm to others (as well as ourselves).  Think about the harm that selling out is causing the victims of discrimination.  Discrimination was made illegal because the public evolved into recognizing the injustices inherent by allowing others to be unfairly unemployed, educated, to get discounted housing, or unjustly enriched for ordinary consumer transactions, like dining, hotel and fitness club memberships.  Why should another person pay so that you feel like you are of a more exclusive elk than you really are?  Or so that you can gouge the system or your company for extra loot?  Why should someone else pay for that?  The discriminator does not deserve the benefit that he receives and the discriminatee certainly does not deserve the harm that she incurs.  Prejudice arbitrarily hinders the victim’s ability to reach their full potential and cuts against their declared inalienable rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Council of Europe, COMPASS, Manual for Human Rights Education with Young people, Discrimination and Intolerance (Assessed 12-21-2024).

Think about the harm that helping discrimination costs society. Assisting intolerance also harms society at large because discrimination undermines the spirit of free competition—a seminal characteristic of American culture.  That is what makes the “American dream” obtainable, it is why we have antitrust laws that prohibit anticompetitive restrictions. 15 USC §1 et seq.. Healthy competition benefits market purchasers, encouraging providers to work harder and price their goods and services appropriately.  Contrarily, allowing discrimination incentivizes laziness, discriminators securing their jobs via immorality and lawlessness instead of value-added skills and contributions.  The quality of goods suffer because providers do not have to compete as much.  Furthermore, harboring inequality sends a message to other women or minorities that they are unwelcomed in a career field or neighborhood, also discouraging them from reaching their full potential.  Similarly, men and white men are taught that their paths to success are not merit-based but vested in cheating others out of their due.  Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, Discrimination, §4 – Why Is Discrimination Wrong? (April 20, 2020)(reviewing several industry drivers for anti-discrimination legislation, discrimination being undesirable from a legal standpoint because it undermines merit and freedom and it demeans others, denying them the same moral status as that of the discriminators). 

Think about the harm that helping discrimination also brings yourself and other discriminators.  Assisting bigoted business practices not only taxes market performance but it burdens the souls of the discriminators as well. 

"When I discriminate against another person or group, I am saying that they do not count as much as I do.  Discrimination is always morally wrong from a Kantian standpoint because it means that I allow myself to count more than the other does: the same rules do not apply to us equally.  But morality requires that no one, and no group, counts more than any other."

Ben-Meir, S., OpenDemocracy.Net, What is morally wrong with discrimination? A Kantian analysis, (July 29, 2020).  When a white man blacklists a black woman from an industry because she is black or a woman, he is saying that his race and/or gender are (morally) superior to hers.  He is saying that black lives matter less… or not at all.  Feminine lives matter not, yet masculine ones do.  But in the eyes of our Creator, all lives weigh the same. Romans 10:11-13 (“For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek, for the same Lord over all is rich to all who call upon Him.”).  Accordingly, when we sell out a piece of our spirituality, we sell out our ethics, morals and legal obligations.  We additionally cultivate the same mentality in others when we reward good for bad moral behavior.  We betray not only other blacks but God Herself. So then selling out is not smart or winning or business savvy, it is a betrayal, a backstab to us and God.

Also consider the unpredictability of consorting with people who do not respect society’s rules.  Today a sellout may be harming others but who can predict who else the sellout may hinder tomorrow?  Why wouldn’t it be you?  How can anyone trust someone who would betray their own kind, really?  In this way, many baseless blacks are like sellouts in sheep clothing, lurking among other blacks in disguise, pretending to be their friends, their brother, waiting for an opportunity to strike or gain more at their expense.

It is not safe for anyone to be in close company with another eager to sell out their morals and values.

Not only do our laws tell us not to commit discriminatory betrayals but the Bible tells us so as well.  Betrayal is sinful, the Bible being full of stories of betrayal: e.g., Joseph’s story of his brothers’ conspiracy to human traffic him (Genesis 37), David’s rape of Bathsheba and conspiracy to murder her husband to continue sexual relations with her (2 Samuel 11), and Judas’s defamation of Jesus and participation in a conspiracy to maliciously prosecute Christ and unjustly penalize Him with crucifixion (Matthew 26:14-16, 47-50). Niranjan, D., DivineDisclosures.com, 49+ Powerful Bible Verses About Betrayal (May 9, 2024).  These betrayals involved lying, jealousy, violence, adulterous thinking and greed—all sinful and spiritually costly actions.  Each one of the betrayers suffered consequences because of their betrayal, and sellouts will be no different.  You will pay something (if not only morally) for your betrayal. 

Joseph’s brothers’ spirit of jealousy grew so strong that some of them contemplated murdering Joseph. Genesis 37:18-22.  Can you imagine the harm that such an act of ultimate violence against a brother would have caused Joseph and their father?  Still, after persuasion from their older brothers Reuben and Judah, the brothers decided to sell him into slavery in Egypt instead and lie to their father, telling him that a wild animal had attacked Joseph. Genesis 37:23-36. 

In doing so, they broke their father’s heart, he was unconsolable, it brought him to the brink of suicide. Id.  The brothers carried the guilt of that lie with them for many years until famine drew them to Joseph’s governance in Egypt. Genesis 42:21-24

"Then they said to one another. 'We are truly guilty concerning our brother, for we saw the anguish of his soul when he pleaded with us, and we would not hear; therefore this distress has come upon us.'

And Reuben answered them saying, 'Did I not speak to you, saying ‘Do not sin against the boy'; and you would not listen?  Therefore behold, his blood is now required of us."

Their father lost confidence in them after Joseph went missing under their care, he did not feel comfortable sending their youngest brother Benjamin back with them to Egypt to get food.  Genesis 42:36-38.  It was not until Joseph finally revealed himself to be safe and successful as the governor of Egypt that they all began to gain some relief from the burden of their lie and kidnapping. Genesis 45.  By that time, the brothers had to come clean to their father about having deceived him for many years about Joseph’s disappearance, shamed before their father and Joseph.  Though Joseph was gracious about their betrayal—acknowledging that God had a predestined plan for his slavery so that he could warn Pharaoh of the coming famine and save many lives, including those of his family—his brothers stayed paranoid about Joseph retaliating against them until the death of their father. Genesis 50:15-26.  Joseph’s brother’s disloyalty to their brother and father cost them their father’s trust, years of guilt, shame, and years of paranoia about repayment, simply because they were undisciplined with their jealousy.  Though Joseph’s brothers meant it for evil, God turned their betrayal into a vehicle for the abnormal promotion of Joseph.

David’s betrayal against Bethsheba and her husband, Uriah, brought shame and violence to David’s own household and servicemen.  In setting Uriah up for a losing battle, not only did Uriah fall but other servants of David had to be killed with Uriah. 2 Samuel 11:17 & 24.  David devastated plural households in his betrayal of Uriah.  Moreover, he broke Bethsheba’s heart. 2 Samuel 11:26.  Additionally, the Lord was very displeased by David’s sin. 2 Samuel 11:27.  In a sense, David betrayed God as well.  His household was then cursed with violence, public shame and death. 2 Samuel 12:9-18.  His first son with Bethsheba died in childhood.  Moreover, his other son raped his daughter out of lust, leading her brother to murder his half-brother in retaliation. 2 Samuel 13.  David’s betrayal thus jeopardized his relationships with God, his home, and his staff, ending up costing him the lives and safety of several of his children, all because David allowed his unchecked lust to take control and lead him to betrayal.

Finally, Judas would have been better off never being born according to Christ. Matthew 26:24.  He sold Christ into crucifixion for the bargain price of 30 pieces of silver, approximately $500 in today’s money, money he never used and tried to return after he saw their plans for Jesus. Matthew 27:3-10; Wikipedia.com, Thirty pieces of silver (Assessed 12-26-2024). 

Judas was so remorseful after handing over Christ to sinners that he hung himself. Id.  Judas never used one coin from his bribe, after he returned it to the chief priests even they were afraid to put it back into their treasury, instead they used it to buy land that would be purposed as a graveyard over time.  Forever disgraced, Judas’ betrayal cost him his relationships with Jesus, the other disciples and his own life.

In hindsight, it is easy to look at the lives of our Biblical ancestors and see how the losses of their undisciplined betrayals were not worth the unjust enrichment offered.  Yet we too often fail to see ourselves in their shoes, to apply these lessons to our own lives.  The burdens on your soul from facilitating discrimination will not be assuaged by the gratuities presented.  What sum of money can repair moral erosion?  What good does it do a woman to gain the entire world but lose her soul? Matthew 16:26.  Selling out is not winning comprehensively at the game of life, it is losing morally, losing with God!  It provides short-term gains at the expense of much more significant long-term losses.  The next time you are offered a bribe to participate in discriminating against another, think about crucifixion, incestual rapes, family murders and facing deep dark secrets; ask yourself is that what I want to be associated with?  No, we are to do unto others—blacks, whites, humans, etcetera—as we would have them do unto us. That is Christ’s example, real winning.

Until next time: God Bless & Namaste (or the spirit in me recognizes and greets the spirit in you)!