Getting Older?... Worried? Well, What Does the Bible Say About It?

Do you ever fuss over growing old?  Maybe even dying?  It is common to hear people bemoan their old age, talk about the “good ole days” gone by, wish for better strength and finer looks, regret the passing of an opportunity to do certain things with our lives, or to make comparisons with what others have that you no longer possess. 

As a single, 45-year-old woman, 10-years financially kidnapped by psychopathic male former employers of mine, I was harassed daily by them with messages that put down my age, trying to cause me to panic and settle for an abusive male partner.  Immorally, they reasoned that if they kept me financially restrained while my procreation window was closing, between the ages of 35 and 45, they could take advantage of me sexually as could other men.  They bribed men with their embezzled corporate money to harass me, trying to extort me into what would be prostitution—engaging in sexual acts for something of value, in this case employment.

There are some very blackhearted people in the world today, which is largely what inspired me to start the Fortify Your Faith eNewsletter.  While my situation is extreme, very excessive, and most people do not suffer such impositions into their lives by older generations, many do struggle with an unhealthy obsession about aging and they get desperate because of it.  Perhaps your closing door is not procreation but your career ending, or your health declining, or your relationships with your own children worsening. Pew Research Center, Views on End-of-Life Medical Treatments, Ch. 6: Aging and Quality of Life (Nov. 21, 2013)(9-17% fewer individuals 65 and older rated their relationship with their kids as “excellent” than did individuals 49 and younger; less than half as many individuals 65 and older rated their personal health as “excellent” than did individuals 49 and younger; and 83% of the surveyed adults of any age said that “feeling what one does is worthwhile” was very/extremely important to having a good quality of life in older age).

Baby boomers—an infamously selfish generation—tend to struggle with becoming elderly, having stark bitterness and resentment towards younger generations and greater depression about their age.  In fact, baby boomers are the most pessimistic age group among us, even gloomier than their (older) predecessors. Pew Research Center, Baby Boomers: The Gloomiest Generation (June 25, 2008)(showing a trend back to 1989 of baby boomers self-rating their life quality as worse than those older than them did; boomers also worrying about money more than other generations and rating their standard of living as worse than their parents more often than younger and older adults).

If you are frequently concerned about your oldness or dying you might have what psychiatrists and counselors would diagnose as an irrational fear about aging—gerascophobia.

"Gerascophobia is a psychological condition that refers to an excessive, persistent, and irrational fear of aging, encompassing physical, cognitive, and social changes associated with it.  This condition can manifest in various ways, including avoiding mirrors or social activities involving older adults and engaging in excessive skincare or anti-aging routines to delay aging-related changes."

Mind.Help, What is Gerascophobia? 10 Signs, Causes, Mental Health Impact (Jan. 09, 2024) https://mind.help/topic/gerascophobia/ .  Some of the signs of gerascophobia are an obsessive preoccupation with physical appearance or youthfulness, obsession with health, illness or death, depression or low mood related to aging or mortality, control issues, low self-esteem/confidence, and/or stress. Id.; TranceformPsychology.com, All About Gerascophobia, the Fear of Growing Old, & How To Overcome it with CBT, Therapy & Counseling,  (Jan. 09, 2024) https://www.tranceformpsychology.com/phobias/fear-of-growing-old-psychotherapy.html ; AntiLoneliness.com, Fear of Getting Old: What is Gerascophobia & How to Cope, (Aug. 16, 2022) https://www.antiloneliness.com/self-development/fear-of-getting-old .  If you have some of these symptoms you might be gerascophobic.  Try talking to a mental health professional about it. 

Outside of psychotherapy, there are spiritual remedies to irrational fears about aging.  Spiritually, you would know that God does not promote apprehension or fear of anything, right? Matthew 6:25-34 (“Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?”).  I knew that God did not want me to be pessimistic about my condition or future in any quarter of my life. 2 Timothy 1:7 (“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”).  Afterall, why would God grant us additional time on Earth if we are to just lament it?  It is unwise to ask God, “why were the former days better than these?” Ecclesiastes 7:10.  There must be something He wants us to do if He has us alive on Earth. Ephesians 2:1-10 (“For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.”).  So, I had to trash what my abusers were saying about my age and see what the Bible teaches about it!  What does God want me to think, feel and believe about growing older?  Here is what I found…

God wants us to trust in Him in every period of our lives, every decade. Isaiah 46:4 (“Even to your old age, I am He, and even to gray hairs I will carry you!  I have made, and I will bear; even I will carry, and will deliver you.”).  I am not to feel resentful about getting older, aging is not a curse, it is a blessing!  Getting more time here on Earth is analogous to being given more money than many of the rest of us have or ever will get.  Time is money after all… perhaps even more valuable because no amount of wealth can ever buy back a minute of time, while many things that money provides are replaceable. 

However, imagine if God doled out cash to humans, every person alive on Earth today, some of us getting $22, some receiving $35, some $45, some $60 and some $86.  Why in the world would an individual receiving more complain about acquiring plenty?  In this case, we are talking about significantly ample time, more than many others have received or soberingly will obtain.  What you do with your cash (or time) is up to you; but we all have limited moments that we get from God. Psalms 90:12 (“So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”); and 1 Peter 1:24 (“ ‘All flesh is as grass, and all the glory of man as the flower of the grass.  The grass withers, and its flower falls away, but the word of the Lord endures forever.’ ”).  So, God shows us favor when we are rich in time, that is nothing to grumble about.  It is an honor to have a long life, an exceptional gift, more precious than gold. Proverbs 16:31 (“The silver-haired head is a crown of glory, if it is found in the way of righteousness.”).

Perhaps the reason we grow bitter for the things we used to possess is because we are focusing too much on enjoying our own lives.  Our own plans and accomplishments cannot compare to God’s agendas.  When we are centered on God’s higher work, our inner selves are constantly renewed, we get more strength and the deterioration of our bodies around us matter less. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18. 

"Therefore we do not lose heart.  Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day.  For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen.  For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal."

If you are anxious about aging, maybe you are too concerned about worldly affairs or yourself and not enough about others or God.  If we spend our younger days focusing on God’s work, it will help us remember Her in the more troubled days of our older age, assisting us in tiding those times all the better. Ecclesiastes 12:1-14.

God promises that if we focus on His affirmation, doing so will help to prolong our lives. Proverbs 10:27-32 (“The fear of the Lord prolongs days, but the years of the wicked will be shortened.”); Deuteronomy 5:16 & 33

“ 'Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.'…

 'You shall walk in all the ways which the Lord your God has commanded you, that you may live and that it may be well with you, and that you may prolong your days in the land which you shall possess. ' ”

This means that if we want to have an enhanced quality of life, a longer, wealthier life, we are to serve God who tells us that our role as seniors is to be disciplined, mentoring and exemplary. Titus 2:1-10.

"But as for you, speak the things which are proper for sound doctrine: that the older men be sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith, in love, in patience; the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things…

Exhort bondservants to be obedient to their own masters, to be well pleasing in all things, not answering back, not pilfering, but showing all good fidelity, that they may adorn the doctrine of God our Savior in all things."

As an elder, do you fit this description?  If not, what can you do to change that?

Conclusion

Therefore, no matter where you are in your days, 25 years old or 95 years old, know that we are all growing older, vanishing and going to Heaven eventually.  Ask God what He wants you to do with your stretch now, your opportunities now, your closed doors from yesterday?  He knows your limitations, your history, your future, what you will or will not do, can or cannot do.  This is what we are to do as spiritual people, ask God for direction, not the world.  When we ask the flesh what we are to do, the world’s “powerful” answer with vanities: fear, worry and control mechanisms.  But God speaks with purpose, tailored tasks that we are designed to do more effectively than others.  That is the reason why we are here, 105 or 15 years old. Ephesians 2:1-10 (as quoted above).

To better cope with aging, here are a few more suggestions.  First, try Googling books on “God’s will” with “old age.”  There are many publications on looking to God for guidance in maturing.  Second, do an Internet or Bible concordance search for what the Bible says about old age.  The references I cited above are but a snippet of what is in the Word of God on this subject.  Third, find some churchwork or charitable work that interests you.  While a competitive work environment may no longer be suitable for you, charities are usually understaffed and often looking for volunteers.  Finally, if you have recently retired and are feeling lazy or bored, do not allow yourself to be idle, stay busy instead. Harvard Health Publishing, Retirement blues: Taking it too easy can be hard on you, (July 25, 2008) https://www.health.harvard.edu/mens-health/retirement-stress-taking-it-too-easy-can-be-bad-for-you#:~:text=It%20might%20seem%20like%20retirement,well%20as%20with%20other%20people. ; IRetiredYoung.net, Early retirement: avoiding laziness and boredom (April 28, 2023) https://www.iretiredyoung.net/post/early-retirement-avoiding-laziness-and-boredom ; and Hoffman, Trystan, HealthPartners.com, Retirement advice: How to beat the retirement blues (Jan. 09, 2024) https://www.healthpartners.com/blog/retirement-stages-and-how-to-beat-retirement-depression/ .  Set goals for doing things that your work never permitted you to do.  Some retirees enjoy taking classes, volunteering periodically, launching a new career, exercising more, doing yoga, blogging, travelling and/or joining a social/boardgame-playing club. Id.  Find where you fit, go there and be a blessing to others while you are there.

Until next time: Namaste (or the spirit in me recognizes and greets the spirit in you)!